Thankful to be a Teacher!

Okay, I know. This post is technically coming a few days late. I've been spending time with family and traveling and haven't really had time to blog. But while sitting on the beach today (yes, I'm bragging), I realized that teachers really do have a lot to be thankful for.

In celebration of the Thanksgiving Holiday, here is my list of why I am thankful to be a teacher;

1. The endless stories I have to tell - I cannot imagine any other career that has half the stories that we do. Seriously, I feel like I could have a very successful stand-up comedy career using the material I experience in my classroom. I truly love the giggles that I get everyday from my babies (even if they don't intend to make me laugh).

2. Parents conferences - I seriously love conferences. Please believe me when I tell you that I have experienced all kinds of conferences. I have had plenty of normal meetings, but I have also had some with parents who have shown up drunk, parents who have cried uncontrollably, parents who threatened to kill me, and even parents who have asked me to go to the bar with them afterward. I am thankful for all conferences though both good and bad because when a parent shows up for a conference, that means that they care in some way about their child's education.

3. My co-workers! There are days that I simply could not get by without a little help from my co-workers. Whenever I feel overwhelmed I know I can always turn to my team members to help me out. I remember feeling guilty when I first began teaching for always taking ideas from my co-workers and never being able to give them anything in return. I found out later that they were using my classroom organization ideas all along. Teaching is all about giving and taking. There may be times when you do a little more giving than taking but it will all even itself out in the end.

4. My paycheck, yep, you read that right. Although I may not be rich, I mean seriously, my husband and I are both teachers, I am thankful that I get a paycheck every other week. I can honestly say that each paycheck is very hard earned. Sure I would love to have a few extra dollars, but I am glad that I earn enough to take care of my family.

5. The light bulb moment - This is definitely my favorite part of teaching. When nothing you do seems to work and both of you are starting to get frustrated and then out of nowhere the light bulb goes on and he just gets it. It's amazing. It's a miracle. It's surely something to be thankful for and it truly gives any teacher a reason to keep on teaching.

Take a minute to reflect on all of the reasons why you are thankful to be a teacher during this Holiday season and remember that you should be thankful for all of the Holiday treats in the lounge even if they do mess up your diet!

You Mean The World To Them!

I didn't forget about this blog. Nope. Actually, I just realized that I talk too much and everyone around me, including my new teachers, already hear all of my stories and advice. However, there are some things that are so important that they need to be put in writing and this is going to be one of them. 

I have a new teacher in my school who has been struggling with her classroom management, just like a lot of new teachers do. Unfortunately, she truly has a class that has a lot of unique personalities in it. It's as if she was given that class for her first year to test her to see if she was meant to really be a teacher (and yes - she really was!!!!)

So although the small tidbits of help I give her may not make her kids be perfect angels, I can tell her this - you mean the world to them. Let me explain:

Example 1

Six years ago, I had the hardest group of students that I have ever had. They were very mature third graders. A lot of them had been through some pretty difficult things. They were a very cliquey group and there were a lot of mean girls and boys who would fight you if you looked at them cross-eyed. I had to try something new every week to survive the year and I remember the relief that I would feel each week when Friday rolled around. I felt like I had to be a drill sergeant each day and that really just isn't my style. Needless to say, I barely survived that group.

On the last day of school two years later as I was walking out (and celebrating in my head!), I got stopped by a student and her mom. It was one of my former third graders from the class-from-you-know-where who was now going into middle school. Her mom explained to me that I "meant the world to her" and that I was her favorite teacher. (Excuse me while I go grab my tissues . .  . ).  She gave me a present and a hug. She honestly didn't need to give me a present. Her recognition was enough. I always felt like I never gave my best to that class because I was always so stressed out. Since that day, I have kept in contact with her. She even recently came to see me during pre-planning and even brought me some pumpkin cookies and candy for Halloween!

Example 2

This example actually continues with that same group of "wonderful" students. I hadn't heard from anyone else in that group besides that one girl, but I always wonder about my former students. Then out of the blue during our school's annual Holiday Program a few years ago someone came up from behind me and put their arms around me (that's pretty easy if you know how short I am!). I turned around and saw a girl who looked exactly as she had four years prior when I had her in the third grade. She told me she didn't want to come back before because she was embarrassed of how she acted but she really learned a lot from me. She too told me I was her favorite teacher because I made her love reading. Since then, she has visited me during every evening program the school has had. However, the most surprising thing was the fact that she remembered my birthday from six years ago and got a bunch of my former students together to call me up at school and sing to me the other day (weep, weep . . . ).

Example 3

This one makes me cry every time I think about it. Eight years ago I had a boy in second grade who was very energetic but a pretty cool kid overall. He was amazing at baseball and I went to a lot of his games. I looped up with my entire class the next year and that was the year his family went through a nasty divorce. He became an entirely new kid that year. It hit him hard and he just shut down. His grades suffered. He didn't want to talk to me or really anyone for that matter. He just became mean. He quit baseball and he went on to become "the bad kid" in fourth and fifth grade. It always hurt my heart because I knew who he really was and I knew what he was going through. I wanted to help him and I tried. Believe me, I tried, but he didn't want to talk to me. So his label just followed him and my heart was broken. However, last year it was put back together when I saw him walking down the hall with his "little brother". He was part of the Big Brothers program and he came to visit me. He gave me a big hug and thanked me. He had turned his life around and was now mentoring our kids and was back to playing baseball for his high school. He thanked me for not giving up on him. He told me that even though he was a "punk" he was still listening to everything I said. 

I could go on and on with my success stories. You may not have these yet as new teachers, but you will as long as you stick with it! Veteran teachers need to be reminded of their success stories every now and then too so feel free to ask them (plus, you know we all love to talk!). After all, it is the reason we all got into this field, right? 

The thing to remember is that the ones that challenge us the most are always the ones that need us the most. They are the ones that need us to be their world!

Oh, No! He's Failing - Now What?

A few years back I had a girl in my class who simply could not meet the standards. I worked with her one-on-one and in small groups every day and did everything that I possibly could do to help her. I knew that if she had just one more year, she would get it.

From the minute that I realized that she was in danger of failing, I started to contact her mother. I called her and left multiple voicemails, I sent notes home and I even sent letters in the mail. The problem was that I never heard back from the parent.

When the end of the year came and I was packing up my classroom during post-planning, I got called to my principal's office. The parent was mad and said that I never contacted her to tell her that her daughter was failing. She truly believed that if she knew then she could have done something to help her. Guess what? Because I had no proof besides my personal notes that I had tried to contact her, the principal took her side and the child was administratively promoted to the next grade. Of course she was unsuccessful in passing that grade and was retained that year, but she really could have benefited from another year with me. I felt like I failed her myself.

Being that it's the middle of the school year, I'm sure you have an idea of who in your class might not pass. Now is the time to start acting on it. I'm here to help you so that you don't run into the same problem as I did.

The first thing you need to do is try to have a meeting with the parents or guardians and the student. The student needs to be there so that he/she can hear and help develop a plan for the rest of the school year.

If you cannot get anyone in for a conference, let the student know that you will be contacting his/her parents or guardians. If messages go unreturned, try email or get a work number. If you still cannot get in touch with anyone, send a registered letter in the mail explaining the situation and asking to meet. You could also try asking a school counselor or administrator to help you out. Sometimes they are even willing to do a home visit for you. Document all attempts to have a conference and make sure an administrator is aware that the student is in danger of failing and of all the attempts you have made to discuss the situation.

Remember you are not just telling the parent that the child is failing. You want to make this clear, but you also need to express confidence in the student's ability to catch up if he/she begins improving right now. Let them know what their child must do in order to pass and how they can support them.

It may seem like a lot of work for just one child, but in the end it'll be totally worth it. Think of how much time you are spending with that child in class right now. If they are just going to get passed along anyway then you will have wasted all this time.

Figure out now who is in danger of failing and start acting on it. You don't want to be sorry come June!

Piranha Parents

We've all heard of helicopter parents and have had parents in our classrooms who just don't want to be involved, but have you ever had a piranha parent? These are the parents who are always on a lookout for any reason to attack you.

No matter how hard I try, I seem to get at least one every year. Although I am either teaching off of the county's assigned curriculum or I am using material or methods that I have found to best teach the subject at hand, there is always someone who thinks I am doing it wrong and they could do a better job than me. Aggravating? YES!! However, my job is not to argue with the parents but instead to show them that my goal is to educate their child in the best way possible.

When I have issues with parents, the factors are usually a) control issues, and/or b) differences in values, and/or c) different perceptions of the child. All three are closely related.

It's important for the parents to understand that they cannot control what happens in my classroom. Likewise, I need to understand that I cannot control what happens at their home. When we have a disagreement, I try to listen to see if there is something I can learn from the parent to improve things for the student in my class.

I try my best to step into their shoes. As a parent myself, I know how annoying it is to have a teacher who just cannot see things your way. A few years back my son was switched midyear into a new classroom due to an increase in enrollment at his school. His new teacher was surplussed from another school and went from teaching fourth grade to teaching first grade for the first time in her life. Having taught first grade myself in the past, I knew what I should expect from him. However she had a hard time transitioning and lowering her standards. We had several conferences with her and even though she knew that my husband and I were both teachers, she talked down to us and made us feel inferior. I couldn't wait until that year was over. I wished she would just step into our shoes and understand what we were going through. It wasn't that we didn't like her. I actually felt bad for her for having to be put into that position in the first place. I know it's hard to think past the yelling and harsh words, but before you act you should try to see things their way.

As important as it for me as a parent to voice my concerns about my children to their teachers, it's just as important to listen to my students' parents. The key is to not be defensive.

There will always be value differences and it is very frustrating when someone doesn't share the same values as us. As teachers we need to remember that these differences can only be bridged by respecting others' values and being willing to compromise.

Parents and teachers often have different perceptions of a student, and both are usually correct. Both of my children are crazy at home and very well-behaved and focused at school. Their teachers never believe me when I tell them how they act with me. People generally behave differently in different contexts. By sharing these perception, teachers can develop a greater understanding of their students.

The bottom line is that although you should feel confident in your knowledge of your subjects and philosophies, you should also welcome parents' perspectives and even their critical feedback. You should never be defensive and you should always try to step into their shoes. Remember that your goal is to help the student and you are never going to get them to listen to you if the parent is badmouthing you at home. Focus on working mutually and building partnerships with the parents instead.

Staff Meetings? Yes!

Wednesday. Hump Day. The middle of the work week. However, in my county every other Wednesday is an early release day. Loved by students yet dreaded by teachers.

As I sat in my early release training today I glanced down at my agenda. A representative from the National Teacher's Association speaking to us about benefits, beefing up our writing instruction to earn better standardized test scores, training on an online data collection system and last but not least, doing focus walks through each other's classrooms to see what we need to work on as a school. To a seasoned teacher, these meetings are just another Wednesday. However, I remember how stressful meetings like these were when I was a new teacher. So much information, so little time to think about it and actually implement it. No one ever thinks about the new teachers when planning these meetings.

Don't get me wrong, veteran teachers feel the same way about trainings. Just think about all of the trainings we have been through in our many years of teaching. Each one trying to tell us a new method or program to use or a new way we will be evaluated. Things change so often in education that it's hard to stay up-to-date with everything. However, veteran teachers know the secret to handling these types of trainings - think about what really matters.

I don't know any teacher who got into teaching for the money. If you ask any teacher why they chose this profession they will give you the same answer - the kids. When you become frustrated with all of the new information you are getting thrown at you, just remember that the only thing that really matters is the students.

I'm not saying that you don't need to listen during the trainings. However, instead of trying to do everything you discussed right away, prioritize all the new information based on how it will help your children and work down the list. I've mentioned my marathon story before. You can't decide you want to run a marathon and then just do it the next day. You need to take small steps. And don't worry if you choose the wrong thing to focus on. That's the beauty of being a new teacher - you can always blame it on your newness and ask for more training.

So the next time you are sitting at a staff meeting stressing out, just take a big breath and think about your students. Remember they are the reason you became a teacher.

What's Your CI?

Yesterday I came across a link on my daughter's gymnastics' Facebook page. It was titled "This One Mistake Could Be Holding You Back From Being a Great Tumbler". Of course I was curious because now that I'm in my 30's I have lost pretty much all of my ability to be a great tumbler. (Or at least I think I have. I'm actually not quite sure because I'm too afraid I'll break a bone if I try.) 

The article explained that the number one mistake tumblers make is to have a low Coachability Index (CI). Basically your CI is how willing you are to accept and implement new information from an authority you respect. There is actually a scale of 1-10 that you are rated on. 

While reading the article, I immediately thought of my first two years of teaching. While I was interning I was told that I was an "amazing teacher" and would definitely be successful anywhere I went. I think that gave me a complex because when I actually started teaching I thought that if I asked for or accepted help I would be admitting that I was a bad teacher. People always offered help and I turned it down just as fast. 

I suffered because I had a low CI. I thought I was too good for help and as a Professional Development Facilitator and mentor I see this a lot in new teachers as well as teachers who have been put on success plans due to low performance. 

A few years ago, I was a mentor to a low performing teacher. That year was one of my most stressful years as a teacher and it had nothing to do with the children. I always feel I need to be successful in everything that I do and being successful with her was just impossible. I sat with this teacher just about every day offering up advice, writing plans and helping her analyze data. Unfortunately, she had a very low CI. Every time I offered a suggestion, she became very defensive and would never try anything different. She ended each day with tears, but would tell me it had to be the kids because she knew what she was doing. Needless to say, she was not asked to return the next year. 

Teachers are ALWAYS learning. I'm not quite sure that there is a perfect teacher out there. Even teachers with over 30 years of experience can learn from novice teachers who have fresh ideas. The best thing you can do as a teacher is to accept constructive criticism and help. Don't offer up excuses when someone points out something they would have done differently. Instead, think about how you could make it better in the future. Suggestions may not always be successful for you, but they are always worth trying. 

Does you CI have room for improvement? 

Thank You, Betty!

Today is National Thank Your Mentor Day. In honor of such a great occasion, I would like to thank my mentor, Betty.

From the day that I first started teaching in Jacksonville, Betty VanGorder took me under her wing. She was an elderly lady who had taught for 30+ years and had transitioned into being the Standards Coach/Reading Recovery Teacher/Professional Development Facilitator. She truly wore a lot of hats, but the most important one was being my mentor.

As many of you know, my first two years of teaching in Massachusetts were a wreck. I was afraid to ask for help and I felt like I was like a slowly occurring avalanche just gathering more snow as the year went on. I felt suffocated by my work and knew that I wasn't helping my children. I moved to Jacksonville for a fresh start vowing to accept any and all help that was offered.

Betty knew that I had just moved to Jacksonville on my own. I didn't know anyone besides the people I worked with. She told me the day that I met her that it was her job to make me be successful. I believe that she took that job very seriously.

Betty checked on me EVERY day. Conveniently her office was right across the hall from my room. I never felt like she was in my face about anything, but instead felt as if she was a friend giving me the support I needed. When she wasn't asking me what she could help with, she was bringing snacks - mostly chocolate - and relieving stress by just coming to chat about life.

The wonderful thing about Betty was that she continued to mentor me even after I left that school three years later. She would talk to me through phone calls and emails and sometimes we would go out to lunch even after she retired.

Sadly, Betty passed away a few years ago. She truly was such an amazing person and I was so lucky to have her in my life.

Take today to thank your mentor. Most mentors go out of their way to help and they deserve to be thanked everyday!